Fear
Life Experiences October 18th, 2009I managed to take a nap today while my baby was taking his nap this afternoon. I get my best rest when I sleep my routine hours. Taking a nap in the afternoons these days is not routine for me. Nevertheless, I closed my eyes and tried to get some sleep.
I saw it. I saw this gigantic, fearsome looking shark in our bathroom. It was grey and frozen in the deep sea being displayed behind a see through glass in our tiny bathroom. The big fish was being contained in a huge aquarium with me standing on the outside. I remember clearly telling myself, if the glass breaks that’s the end of me.
The fear felt so real that it woke me up. I could still see the awesome magnificent creature even in my waking moments. The whole scenario seemed not only senseless, but also impossible. My bathroom can only contain one baby bathtub. I keep reminding myself that.
It’s now one in the morning. My baby is fast asleep since midnight. Usually, I would gladly turn off the lights, put up my tired feet and get a good night’s rest, but not tonight.
I asked myself why am I avoiding sleep. I discovered the simple answer. I want to avoid meeting that fearsome Jaws again. I soon realised that my fear is real. I feel so silly, and yet I could get rid of this fear throughout the day. I reasoned with myself, the fish was not even moving. It was like a statue, and frozen! My need for reasoning made me feel even sillier.
My children are afraid of monsters and the dark. I keep telling them that monsters do not exist. But then again, neither do sharks lurk in our bathrooms!
I am now more respectful of their baseless fears.
Good night! And sweet dreams!